According to Springtide Research Agency, 40% of 13 to 25-year-olds say they have no one to talk to; no one knows them well. 

Springtide also recently asked young people where they had felt a sense of belonging. They were looking for which organizations were “getting it right.”

“Over and over, they would tell us who—who created a sense of belonging for them. It turns out, the place or setting didn’t matter nearly as much as the relationships these young people had with family, friends, and caring adults.”

We exist to reach young people in the margins. Those caring adults Springtide mentioned? Our hope is that’s us. That’s our volunteers and ministry leaders. 

So how do we do it? How do we create spaces where kids can encounter trusted adults and build relationships where they are seen, heard, and not judged? Relationships that cultivate safety, and belonging that builds the kind of trust necessary to engage in honest, authentic conversations about Christ? 

We asked Heide Maschhoff, Orting Campus Life Coordinator, how she and her team cultivate that kind of belonging in their Club settings. 

The first thing Heide said was, “It’s our job to love them and meet them where they’re at.” In practice, that looks like prioritizing relationships over opinions and not drawing lines between “insiders” and “outsiders.” 

For example, she says, “I’ll use whatever pronoun a kid wants…that’s not my hill to die on. I’ve never felt conflicted about it. I’ve prayed about it. Because a name means community.” When you know somebody’s name, when you refer to them in the way they’ve asked, it communicates that they are seen, heard, respected and that their presence matters. “These kids don’t have Jesus,” she says, “and they’re hurting.”

“I think some of my leaders might initially balk at that and then I think they can start to see like, oh, these kids come.” 

Heide shared that there are many kids who will come to Orting Campus Life, but vehemently talk about how they don’t like Christians in their family or community based on the bigotry they’ve experienced. One girl, she said, comes to Campus Life every week with the biggest grin, despite having experienced rejection from other youth organizations. Heide shares these stories with her leaders because “I just want them to see how incredible this is. That she comes to something where we talk about Jesus all the time.”

“I just see so many kids who are hurt, whether it’s by family, whether it’s by other thoughtless teenagers or whatever else. They have so much stacked against them.” Heide said. “These kids are really deeply looking for community. ‘How am I known? What’s my status?’”

When kids first come to Club, “some of them are prickly and they’re going to push and see if you like them…they want to know, ‘Am I really welcome?’”

The hope is that eventually, as relationships deepen and trust is built, and Jesus’ love is experienced, a space opens up where leaders can have more conversations about faith. But there’s no time limit. There’s no hierarchy of kids who already know Jesus and kids who don’t. “It’s not a club for Christians,” Heide said. Christian teens are just as welcome as anyone else, but It’s intentionally built for kids who aren’t necessarily involved in Christian community elsewhere. 

Heide and her team are very transparent that they love Jesus and the brief messages shared are about Jesus so there’s no hidden agenda, no bait and switch. But there’s also no expectation that any kid has to “fall in line” or change their beliefs or behaviors to belong. “I might be a seed planter who never sees fruition,” Heide said. 

“Regardless of what you believe,” Heide shared, “I’m never going to love you less for who you are.”

Because the door is so wide open, the reality is that many leaders encounter a diversity of abilities, perspectives, and backgrounds they may have never experienced. The unknown can be uncomfortable.

Heide and her team are intentional about prayer and leaning into the Lord for guidance. They pray before each Club, but also for individual students throughout the week. In the midst of an interaction, they may just pray, “Holy Spirit, help.” Heide said, “I think that can be the most powerful prayer out there.” She calls her own prayer life “a constant conversation.”

She also engages young people in grace-filled conversations about their experiences. “I always ask questions when I feel uncomfortable,” Heide explained. “How does that feel? Or, how does that affect you? Or, has it been hard?” Their answers are a gift. You can gain powerful insight into someone’s life and learn how to love them better in the future.

Heide also leans on honesty, admitting that it is a challenge to stay on top of the ways culture is constantly changing. “I just openly say, ‘I’m really sorry. I’m probably going to say the wrong thing. Heads up, I’m not trying to be offensive.’” Even though you might make a mistake, they might see at least you’re trying to honor their experience. 

Because of the work they do to make Campus Life a place where everyone can belong, Heide and the team in Orting have had the opportunity to start small group bible studies and gift kids their very first bibles, invite students to church when they’ve expressed curiosity, and guide kids who do know Christ into a deeper walk with Him. 

When we start with belonging, no matter what, we are able to build authentic, caring relationships. Springtide found that “connecting young people to more trusted adults in what we call ‘belonging relationships’ is one antidote to their rampant loneliness and social isolation.” We also earn the opportunity to invite them into a relationship with God who tells us we have belonging with Him, no matter what. 

If you’d like more information on Campus Life or how you can join us in reaching the 100,000 young people of Pierce County with the love and hope of Jesus, click below.