If you’ve been around Youth for Christ for a while–or not very long at all–you’ll hear the word “relationship” being used a lot. The very concept of “relationship” is foundational in everything that we do. All of our ministries are designed to engage youth in authentic, Christ-sharing relationships. Our methods for introducing youth to the gospel are in the context of relationship. And our ultimate goal is that youth would be engaged in a lifelong relationship with Jesus. 

Relationships are not one-sided, one-time transactions; they are on-going and reciprocated two ways. 

I came into Tacoma YFC as a volunteer, wanting to build relationships with youth and have a great impact upon their lives. But the truth is, I didn’t truly understand that relationships are mutual and go two ways. I saw myself as the person ministering to poor, at-risk youth. In other words, I was the hero coming to save the day, and they were the lucky beneficiaries. 

But like God often does, He’s used so many unlikely people to humble me and teach me. At some point, I realized that I wasn’t the teacher–I was the student; the people in my community, the Hilltop, were the teachers. God used some of my neighbors–who had less than me–to teach me about generosity and selflessness time and time again, whether it was inviting me to their barbeque, sharing the bounty from their garden, giving birthday presents to my kids, or even confronting burglars (at gunpoint) who were trying to break into our home on more than one occasion. 

Likewise, youth over the years have been my best teachers, and they’ve graciously welcomed me into their world. When I first started volunteering at Sozo, for the first time in my life I was the outsider who didn’t understand anything about the culture. The youth translated their slang for me (usually while laughing at me), taught me about important cultural things of importance like shoes and hair, and let me into the deeper “why” of behaviors that I didn’t understand. There were also times when the youth protected me from physical harm, or would come and find me to let me know that I’d left my garage door open at night. And whenever I needed help moving something heavy, I always had an army of youth ready to help. 

I didn’t truly get it my first few years, but I understand it now…that’s what happens when there’s an authentic relationship. I’ll serve them, and they’ll serve back. If it’s not two-sided, then it’s not an authentic relationship. 

I experienced this grace a lot this last month. In late March, we found out my dad was in the final stage of cancer, and he passed away seven weeks later. I was overwhelmed by the compassion, kindness, and prayers that I received from so many people. But what overwhelmed me the most was the outpouring of love that I received from my former Sozo youth. So many of my former youth (now adults) reached out to let me know that they were praying for me, asking if I needed anything, and writing really kind words. I’d forgotten how many youth knew my parents and had been to their home in Stanwood, and many reflected on memories that they had of my dad. 

Almost fourteen years ago, I had set out to minister to youth in the Hilltop. But now in 2020, those same youth are the ones ministering to me.