When I asked Mel, a 6th grader, about her day, she said it was a “meh” day. “Yesterday was a good day, though,” she said. 

“So yesterday was a good day, but today’s a ‘meh’ day?” I asked by repeating. 

She went on to share that her military dad had just left for two months and it was hard on her. She felt bad for feeling bad.

I told her that I feel bummed out when my husband leaves for work with the Army.

She added more: “One time my dad went to Korea for one year, but he ended up staying for two years.” I asked her when she found out that it was going to be two years instead of one. She replied, “I didn’t.”

Basically, due to COVID, he just kept staying longer and longer. For military-connected youth, this kind of uncertainty is a daily reality.

I asked about what her family does while her dad is gone that they don’t do while he’s at home. She said they get to shop! That brightened her face a bit.

This is now about the tenth time that I’ve talked with Mel at lunches and this was the deepest we have ever gone. It’s a picture of what it’s like to be a military-connected youth and what it looks like to build relationships. Young people need trusted adults to help them walk through the hard parts of life, and building trust takes time. It is beautiful to see that trust pay off, so we keep showing up, day after day, and connecting with kids however we can.